Misadventures of Inday
I am solitary. I find it hard to succumb into slumber, though the downpour of rain should’ve makes it easy. This exuberant emotional glue I have for you cannot be simply washed away. The multiplicity of what I feel for you is inevitable. This isn’t platonic. It’s real, true romance
(Si Inday, nag-eemote sa bintana, habang iniisip si Dodong, ang boyfriend niya.)
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It’s not that I don’t like you. It’s just that I feel we’re still too young to entertain thoughts of fornication in the domicile of our employers. In fact, it’s very immature to insinuate that I don’t reciprocate your emotions just because I decline to perform an act of coitus with you.
(Inday, ni-reject si Dodong na makipagsex.)
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Misis: Inday! Bumili ka nga ng mga isda! Oo nga pala, inglesera ka na nga pala ngayon. Would you please purchase many fishes for our this week’s meals?
Inday: Judging from your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term “fishes”, although rarely and erroneously used, connotes a plethora or an array of different kinds of the aforementioned gilled creatures. But the more pressing questions before I traverse the road to the wet market would be: What type of fish? Fillet or not? Frozen or just right smack the day’s catch” (Pauses) Aaaaahh. By manner of careful extrapolation, given the meager budget and this household’s quasi-peasant middle class taste, I assume then I will source the staple “Ga-lewng-gong”, am I correct?
Misis: Leche!
Inday: Oh, you meant the freshwater milkfish? The “ba-ngooz.” Is it not?
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Potatoes, when consumed in their raw state, are rapidly converted to glucose that raises insulin levels because of simple sugar. When cooked in high temperature like French fries, they produce large amount of free radicals in the body causing aging, clotting, inflammation, cancer, weight gain. 1 French fry is worse than a cigarette
(Sagot ni Inday sa amo nang tanungin siya kung bakit di siya nagluto ng French fries. Nuritionist din pala si Inday.)
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– Drunken tiger shrimp and blue lobster meat cut diagonally with caviar served with milagrosa rice (red variety rice) and apricot sauce – Vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive oil garnish with mint leaves – Lychee and peach salad with sour cream and cream cheese topped with lemon zest(Baon ni Jun Jun sa daycare na inihanda ni Inday)
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Heavy fire exerted by the stimulus affected the best conductor of heat which is the steel, causing the Oriza Sativa to change it’s state of color, smell as well as the taste.
(Sagot ni Inday nang tanungin siya ng amo kung bakit nasunog ang sinaing.)
[alam ko Oryza Sativa un eh .. pero baka magalit si Inday pag nicorrect.]
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Bloody hell what the fuck did just land on my cutie top? I mean I’ve spent all day just to make myself look fabulous. I think I have to remove this eeeewwwyyy thing in a whip wham of time.
(Inday, nag-iinarte nang matalsikan ng mantika habang nagluluto ng tilapia.)
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Love, a wildly misunderstood, although highly desirable, malfunction of the heart that weakens the brain causes the eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker.
(Inday, gumagawa ng blog entry sa multiply account niya.)
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People ask, why fall in love when being hurt. My answer? It makes me feel alive! Because whether I feel the greatest hurt or the greatest love, there’s sheer bliss or flood of tears. I’m on top of the world or at the bottom of the done chain. It makes my heart beat fervently. I tell you, I’d rather fall in love over and over again than to blend in with millions of heartless zombies who resolved to play safe.
(Payo ni Inday kay Ederlyn na ayaw na ma-inlove.)
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I stay awake in the coldness of the darkened sky contemplating why, for some reasons, has my emptiness made itself manifests, extending to that niche where I was given life and growth, that because of austerity I was made separated from.
(Si Inday habang hindi makatulog dahil na-ho-homesick.)
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I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of work that you want. My creativity, productivity and work-efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost d work progress
(Sagot ni Inday sa bago niyang papasukan.)
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Amo: Inday di ba nanood ka ng The Buzz?
Inday: Opo. Bakit mam?
Amo: Bakit daw umalis si Angel Locsin sa GMA7?
Inday: Sometimes, people choose to leave not because of selfish reasons but because they just know that things will get worse if they’ll stay. Leaving can be a tough act, and it’s harder when people can’t understand you for doing so.
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A change in the weather patterns might have occurred causing havoc to affected surroundings. The way debris are scattered indicates that gust of wind was going northeast, causing damage to the path it is going..
(Sagot ni Inday sa amo nang tanungin kung bakit nagkalat ang basura sa likod ng bahay.)
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Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well-engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.
(Sagot ni Inday nang tanungin siya ng amo kung bakit nagkabukol si Junior.)
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Listening to the nonsense talk about someone’s life is a pathetic way of entertainment. It doesn’t contribute to the good of society. I hate character assassinators!
(Reklamo ni Inday nang na-tsismis siya ng kapitbahay.)
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Off you go! Under no circumstances this house would relent to such unabashed display of vagrant destitution…
(Inday, pinapaalis ang makulet na pulubi sa gate.)
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Misis: Inday! Pagkatapos mong maglaba, linisin mo buong bahay pati kisame at kaskasin mo yung tiles ng dalawang pool! Paliguan mo na yung tatlong aso at magluto ka na ng hapunan dahil maya-maya lang, darating na ang sir mo. Tapos, pumunta ka kina Mrs Rosales, dalhin mo yung apat na malalaking kahon. Bumili ka na din ng isang galing mantika, ketchup, toyo, 10 sardinas, 20 corned beef, 30 century tuna, 15 maling, at isang sakong bigas. Oh, heto pera. Sakto yan. Maglakad ka na lang at strike mga tricycle ngayon, okay?
Inday: Tang ina mo!
(Ito ‘yong panahong wala pang “manners” si Inday. Nabastusan ang amo kay Inday Kaya pinag-aral siya ng manners sa Inglatera.)